Though I have left Turkey and am home safe and sound, a part of me is still there in spirit...mostly in the form of me describing my Turkish trench assistant to people. He was, to keep it short, a unique spirit whom we termed "The Incredible Edible" in conversation (due to his name, which I will keep secret).
The Incredible Edible tended to speak somewhat poetic English and we later decided that he must think in haiku (5-7-5 for syllable beats). Once we determined this, my good friend Liz was able to tap into his possible thought processes and create some haiku based on real events from this summer. These are the results of her brilliance:
Sleeping-
I need a mattress
I think I'll take her mattress.
Why is she angry?
Bathing-
This water is cold
Thank you for reinforcing
My thought processes
Laundry-
My clothes are dirty
I'll put a lemon with them
And they will smell clean
Eating-
Adam and Lily!
I'm hungry and I am dream-
ing of the meatballs
Hygiene-
They say I'm dirty
But I cannot smell myself
So I must be clean
Sharing is Caring-
I'll take Katie's Coke,
But I'll give some to her friend,
So she can't be mad.
Day in the Life-
This was a big day
First I ran the wheelbarrow
Then sat in the shade
My trip to Iran-
They said I was lost.
But I wasn't lost at all.
I knew where I was.
A visitor-
My girlfriend's coming
Maybe I'll take a shower;
No, I guess I won't.
Creature comforts-
Fans are great for naps.
Maybe one fan is enough
But two are better.
Lost in Translation-
Katie spoke Turkish
But my Turkish is better.
I'll reiterate.
Diplomacy-
Katie's workers call
Her names. But I won't tell her.
She might get angry.
I kid not, all of these are absolutely based on real events. To be fair, he was a kind guy, but was definitely unique. If you are ever interested in hearing more, I have many, many more stories to share :)
